Down in Fraggle Rock

In more mundane news, it hit 83 today, and I didn't once think of even putting the a/c in the window, much less turning it on. This, my friends, is the magic of brick, insulation, and trees. Oh, and crossbreezes. I cannot wait to own my own home, but in the meantime, this apartment isn't too bad of a substitute.

Here it is, 2:30 in the morning again. J is sound asleep - which is good, because his ass needs to go to work in the morning. Me? Wide awake.

I wouldn't be so irritated if it weren't for the fact that we had sex earlier tonight. See, I'm like a stereotypical man after sex, generally - I'm not interested in talking (I'm usually not capable of it), I just want to cuddle up and go to sleep. This is usually just fine with both J and me, considering that the only time we have lately to make with the sexing is in the evening before bed.

Perhaps it is worth noting, however, that both last night and tonight, I did not orgasm. It's mostly my fault - I'm dehydrated, and certain, ah, important exterior tissues are a bit irritated right now. The fact that we're using condoms at the moment doesn't help the situation much. J freaked out last night when I hissed at him as he slid in - my usual reaction is generally louder and more positive, shall we say. I'm pretty sure he feels a tad guilty about my lack of orgasm as well - if only because penetration tends to get me off faster and better than almost anything else, especially in the proverbial "missionary position". And here I was having doubts about whether I had a submissive streak!

One thing I have made clear to J though - a rarity! - is that orgasm is great, and I certainly enjoy it, but I like sex even without it. I'm a woman; sex means intimacy to me. Even though "commitment" is more of a four-letter word to me than "fuck", I do like feeling connected to people, especially J. While I do have the occasional issue with submitting to him, I do trust him with much more than I let on - much more than I trust anyone else with.

And speaking of submitting to him, sure as shit, on Monday night as we watched some lovely Japanese bondage porn, he hinted that this weekend he'd certainly be interested in my spending it naked in various fashions. I, in my usual way, pressed for more details. He's not been forthcoming with them - whether because he doesn't know them or wants to frustrate me, I'm not sure - but he has hinted more about nudity, and fun things like spanking, rope, collars, and ball gags. Right now, I'm looking forward to it. I'm pretty sure I'm ready to stop just dangling my feet of the dock and jump in the lake already. Enough with the reading! More with the submitting!